On the calendar: Ask Roger Anything
13 hours ago
I've moved the blog, but here is the blogroll, mine and others I follow.
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2 comments:
Thanks Roger. I ended up having a very nice birthday. Bobby got me flowers and a very large purple mylar balloon. My friends Betty and Catherine (who you met at R and R's wedding) took me out for dinner on Wed night for Mexican food, and Catherine brought me a beautiful plant, which I plan to plant in the backyard. On Thursday, Bobby cooked ribs, etc. and we watched a movie. R and R came over and joined us for lunch. I received several calls and e-mails from friends. In PM, Bobby took me to see a revised rendition of Godspell at Lambs Players. It was very well done with some honest to goodness, laugh out loud comedy mixed with the powerful message.
So, my day was good. Thank you for the birthday blog.
Love,
Leslie
Hi Raji,
I read your blog this morning, and it struck a chord. Since I'm the middle of three daughters (and apparently the "responsible one" since my parents are gone), I fully understand these conversations. I've had similar talks with my younger sister, who is chronically stressed with low self-esteem to boot. Lib had a bad marriage where she was emotionally abused for 16 years, but she has two great kids who I wouldn't trade for anything (and you know how I feel about kids). One conversation I particularly remember is the April after Dad died, when the three of us were in Syracuse (Patrick being in Iraq) to go through our family things. I made an offhand remark upon arriving that there were all kinds of dolphins in my room (dolphins being my niece's favorite mammal, my room destined to become hers in a few months, since they moved in) and what was that? The next day at 7AM the phone rang, with my sister on the other end spouting all kinds of stuff about "wanting her kids to feel secure" and "this behavior has to stop" and "I need support from my family." I talked her down, as is the function of the middle, responsible child, but it made me sad that there was (yet
another) 40-something woman who couldn't direct her anger onto the
appropriate party. I've had several such conversations with her since,
and I don't think it's going to stop any time soon (mostly because she has hooked up with someone who is, on many levels, the same kind of person as my ex-brother-in-law. History repeats). So I persevere.
Took a long time to get here, but that being said....these incidents and conversations are part and parcel of being a part of family. You and Carol came to parenthood late, and I think that might be coming into play here. Lydia is a lovely girl, and I truly look forward to meeting her sometime soon. And that's the important thing -- that Lydia is a lovely girl, and in your eyes, "pretty." I don't know which of your sisters made the remark, but I think I can guess...and Raji, just let it go. There was no "malice aforethought," just a gut reaction. And yours is the same. In the end, they're your sisters, and Lydia's aunts, and that's what matters.
I do miss you guys, every day --
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